May 2, 2009
Letter from the Editor
Hello everyone,
Welcome to the Spring issue of Della Donna. I have to admit, I am very excited about this one. Excellent articles, poems and pieces of artwork lend themselves to a fabulous issue. Not only that, but Susan Campbell, an author whose work I was recently introduced to and really admire, accepted an interview with us. She is a fascinating (and funny!) woman and I am sure you will enjoy getting to know her.
We also have a new addition to the 'zine - our brand new "Share This" button! You can find it at the bottom of every post, and it allows you to share your favorite pieces with others through Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, or the social networking tool of your choice. I hope that if you read something worthwhile, you will consider sharing it.
Thanks again for your support and loyalty,
- April
Interview with a Fabulous Female
Susan Campbell is an award-winning columnist at the Hartford Courant, where her work has been recognized by the National Women's Political Caucus, New England Associated Press News Executives, the Society for Professional Journalists, the American Association of Sunday and Feature Editors, the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, and the Sunday Magazine Editors Association. She is also the author of Dating Jesus: A Story of Fundamentalism, Feminism and the American Girl. Susan was kind enough to take the time to discuss her work, her faith and her outlook with Della Donna editor April Boland.
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AB: What prompted you to write Dating Jesus?
SC: I was moved to write Dating Jesus on several fronts, not the least of which I felt like I'd been arm-wrestling with God for decades, and She kept winning. I had this mad scriptural memorization thing going, but couldn't tell you the context of all the verses I knew. I felt and feel like religion is an important motivator for some (for good or ill) and decided I needed to figure out my own theology and how it motivates me. That's my spiritual motivation, I guess. My temporal motivation was I was in a writing group and hadn't taken anything to read in weeks and weeks, so one night before my writers' group met the next day, I whipped off a three-page essay on my baptism, and the other members of the group were so encouraging, I kept writing.
AB: Your memoir is controversial because it criticizes a certain Christian paradigm. What has the general reaction been?
SC: I have to say it's been pretty gracious. I have heard from people who've left the church and people who are still in there, and I think of those who contact me, many of them do see the need to shift our attention from the rule and letter of the law to the spirit of it. As for people who might adamantly disagree with me and send me to hell over it, I really haven't heard from them. Maybe they've given me up for lost. Or maybe they know I was raised and trained as they were raised and trained, and I will stay in an argument on just about any topic until I'm dead. As my brother said, we argue thus: Hit 'em early, hit 'em hard and leave 'em to bleed out on the floor. That's not very Christ-like but then, neither am I.
AB: Do you have any advice for other women who struggle within a patriarchal religion?
SC: I would advise anyone (man or woman) in a patriarchal religion to really stop and listen to that still small voice, the one that pokes at them when they hear something they know is wrong. We know how women suffer in a patriarchal religion, but men suffer too, because their spiritual training sets them up to think life's going to treat them a particular way simply because of their genitalia, and the world really isn't like that. What a disappointment that must be to reach an age in a secular world and realize your genitalia can only get you so far. I'm not even being snotty here. God didn't make a segregated world. We all benefit from sharing the weight and the pleasure of an egalitarian one.
AB: How has your faith background played into your career as a journalist?
SC: My religion was excellent training ground for my work as a journalist. It taught me to look at things for reasons, for motivation. It taught me as an outsider (and a fundamentalist is definitely an outsider in the real world) to view people different from myself with a little bit of compassion. It doesn't work that way for everyone, but it did for me, and I shall be forever grateful.
AB: Do you believe there is such a thing as Christian feminism? What does it look like to you?
SC: Though there are plenty of people who disagree with me, I do think there is such a thing as Christian feminism. I believe it's called "Christianity," the real kind, the kind found in the Bible and created by Jesus. Jesus never intended there to be second-class citizens, not based on gender or sexual orientation or anything else.
AB: What are you currently working on?
SC: I'm currently working on putting off starting my second book, and I am quite skilled at that - turns out I'm better at that than I am at writing. But it's on my list of things to do, I promise.
AB: Who are your writing influences?
SC: I have a lot of writing influences, and wouldn't want to leave anyone out, but I am heavily influenced by the classic novels I read growing up (like Little Women) because the stories in there are so finely told. I am not comparing my work to Louisa May Alcott's, but she's a fabulous storyteller.
AB: Do you have a favorite quote that sums up your philosophy on life?
SC: My favorite quote is from Philippians 4:13: "I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me." Corny, but there you are. It's that or "Bite me." I like that one, too. Did I mention I'm not terribly Christ-like? But I know a lot of scriptures.
Politics & Social Issues
What Does it Really Take to Make Someone Happy?
by EJH
A few weeks ago, I was driving around town running some errands. In my city, we seem to have an excessive number of panhandlers, or at least more than I’ve witnessed living in other cities. Sometimes it feels like they are at every street corner. So while driving, I spotted a woman on the corner at a stoplight. She was fairly young – perhaps in her early 40’s – and she had a crutch. She was wearing old jeans and a few layers of shirts, and her hair was pulled back. As I approached the red light, she was directly to my left holding a sign. I thought for a few moments and quickly realized I had no cash, so I rolled down my window and asked her how she was doing. I explained that I didn’t have any cash on me but asked if she might like something to eat.
Her face lit up. I asked her what she wanted, and she looked around for a moment before letting me know that I could just go to the Church’s Fried Chicken restaurant across the street. I asked her what she would like to eat – I’m not going to spend money on food for someone unless it’s what they really want to eat – and she said anything as long as the chicken was not spicy. I zipped over to Church’s, got some random combo meal and walked it over to her.
I was expecting sort of a quick exchange, yet I was amazed by how truly thankful she was. You could see it in her face – her whole demeanor and expression changed. When she saw I had also purchased her a drink with the combo, she exclaimed, “Oh! I was praying you’d get me a drink. Oh I’m so glad!” I had never seen someone so happy to get a medium-sized Pepsi in my life. She thanked me again and we parted ways.
The entire bill for her combo meal came to $6.27. I was overwhelmed by how very little it had taken to make someone so happy. It’s so easy these days not to be satisfied. Our minds tend to latch on to what we don’t have or wish we had. God knows, I spend a lot of time wallowing in negative thought myself, which is probably why it was so surprising to me to witness firsthand how a $6 buck combo meal could totally make someone’s day. I was jealous in many ways because it had been a while since something so simple had made me so happy.
As a social worker, I am often amazed at the sheer cruelty of others. In my experience, most of this cruelty is what I once heard referred to as “accidental cruelty” – in other words, people don’t intentionally mean to hurt or mistreat others. They act out of their own needs and let the chips fall where they may. I believe that accidental cruelty can also occur out of ignorance and misunderstandings about situations. I have experienced a lot of accidental cruelty displayed to panhandlers and it is something I’ve never gotten used to. I don’t want to get used to it.
A lot of people might think I was foolish to give that woman a meal. I’m wasting my money, she should really get a job, she’s being lazy – if she just tried hard enough she could get it together. I wonder if the people who say that have ever been unemployed or disabled. I have also heard people theorize that panhandlers aren’t really in need, but that they secretly have apartments and cars. I wonder if these people realize that you can have enough money to pay for rent but not enough for food or that people sleep in the cars they own because they can’t afford a place to live. I wonder if they know what’s like to live on a job that pays $6 an hour and offers no benefits. Maybe this woman did have an apartment and a job, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t need help. It doesn’t mean she has enough to pay for rent and bills and food and medical care. I barely have enough to cover all that and I have a Master’s degree and work at a good job.
The most common complaint I hear is that all panhandlers are actually addicts. This could be true, though I doubt literally every homeless person has a drug issue. My opinion has always been, who the hell cares? Drug addicts need to eat too. I understand that they could use my money for drugs, but they could also be using it to buy their kids something to eat. Throwing around the phrase, “They’re all just a bunch of addicts,” enables people who think they have it together to emotionally distance themselves from those in need. What you’re really saying when you label a panhandler as “just an addict” is, “I am better than this person because I am not an addict. They deserve to be where they are because they use drugs/alcohol.” Maybe I’m just a silly 'kumbaya' social worker, but I believe that no one deserves to be without basic needs.
I don’t kid myself. I know that my actions do nothing to resolve the obvious serious and long term issues these folks are facing. I know that the woman I bought the chicken for was probably back panhandling within minutes of finishing her meal. For long term change to happen, I would need to consistently give money to organizations that help the homeless, vote for political candidates who are willing to pass laws and bills that support social service programs, and volunteer more of my time on an ongoing basis. But in the moment when something simple is needed, stepping up and saying, “Sure, I’ll help with that,” does make a difference. I have always felt that small changes lead to big changes.
In my opinion, a large part of life is living within a community. These panhandlers are my neighbors, and isn’t it really our duty to help folks out when they need it? Haven't there been times when all of us have needed help? The only difference is that some of us have parents, siblings, friends or spouses who will lend us a few bucks when we’re short or give us a ride when our car is broken down, and others do not. What would we do if we didn’t have those people? What might any of us be forced to do if our need was desperate enough?
EJH has been writing poetry since she was 12 years old. She is originally from the Northeast but has lived in Austin, Texas for 7 years. She currently works as a licensed social worker for a large non-profit organization. You can find more of her poetry at her blog.
by Elise Rasmussen
The artist says, "The Night Series presents photographs of deep night where images of plant life are caught in the glare of brilliant lights. The work infers psychological states such as vulnerability and isolation."
Elise Rasmussen received her BFA from Ryerson University in 2004 and her MFA from the School of the Art Institute of Chicago in 2007. She has exhibited her work in galleries in North America and Europe and will be traveling to Newfoundland this fall to work as an artist-in-residence at the Pouch Cove Foundation. She currently resides in Brooklyn, NY. You can find more of her work at her website, EliseRasmussen.com.
Lit by Chicks
Where I Am From
by Mary Moss
I am from newspaper women
and farmer's wives
spines of steel
wisdom beyond imagining
no dreams of fame and fortune
just ordinary lives
I am from hard work and ancient wounds
never forgotten nor spoken of
nor exposed to light of day
survival of the fittest
overcoming struggle
manifesting deep love
I am from the ocean and the sand
eternal horizon expanding
waves crash and roar
undertow pulls and releases
shells and skeletons from the deep
a million grains of understanding
I am from ancient earth mothers
sisters of magic and mystery
creators of hope and beauty
vessels of future dreams
dutifully bearing children
changing the course of history
I am from spirit and flesh and bone
made to wonder "why?"
seeking ever after truth
needing only the next question
asking always for the answer
looking ever to God in the sky
I am from the earth and sky
thriving where nothing should grow
dirt and clouds, sun and rain
blooming where I'm planted
desiring only air and water
sometimes reaping more than I sow
I am from woman and man
destiny, desire and chance
created in an image and likeness
struggling to be different
resigned to be who I am
rising above my circumstance
I am from saints and angels
wings of gossamer and gold
seen from the corner of my eye
whispers and quiet breezes
in my head and on my skin
heavenly secrets in dreams unfold
I am from the eternal source of life
created for a purpose and a reason
perfectly and divinely designed
journeying toward heaven
offering up my future and my past
each twist and turn in time and season
Mary Moss is called to create opportunities where people can experience how their stories interconnect with God's story. She lives this out through writing, speaking and storytelling. Mary is a columnist at Take Root and Write and a regular contributor to numerous online journals. She is the author of Woman At The Well, her first book of poetry and devotionals, and maintains three blogs. You can find Mary's work at her website, Divinely Designed.
Lifestyles
Amidst Recession, Dream
by Nicole Molino
There is a roller coaster ahead of us. Collectively, we take this ride together. I've been in preparations all my life. This moment here, right now. It's like nothing I ever imagined yet somehow I expected because I know the truth. Thus, I have a utility belt of sorts. The most important is my family. Through them my dreams are coming true. Dreams that naturally, progressively fine tune. An orchestration of movement and sounds. I have found solace in the peaceful quiet. And yet I am now keenly aware that communication is key. All the math problems I pushed myself to work have my brain wired for this. There are so many ways for my mind to be influenced. My trust to be gained and too often broken. There are no tears left to cry. Just the drive to keep going and the exhaustion to recharge.
I made a chart tonight. The painting was on the back side of last month's calendar; we keep green in this house like some keep kosher. I am in track mode currently. Tracking my childrens' behavior. Let me backtrack--my neighbor and I were discussing the kids as we drove home, her from work, I from shopping. The little boys are both still toddlers whom are fast paced towards pre-k. They are so well behaved and even better together! They keep each other busy and I can actually get things done. The older too-smart-for-their-own-good pre-pre-teens are quite the characters. I mentioned how I have done charts with my boys for rewards and works in progress. But life happens and these charts go without from time to time. The boys are flourishing and mama's gotta prepare them to be great men. So, there's always a lot of talking going on. So much information to process, so little time. I accept and embrace my role with every fiber of my being. This is a dream come true! I remember the old days of carrying around a baby that was so realistic that everyone must have thought I was such a good mommy. I communicate with myself on the things I want in life, the things I need to change. So, the chart lists Good Manners, to which I gave each boy a smiley face to start. Below the boys names I dedicated a spot to list Mom's specials. These will be the rewards the boys will work towards--the good things in life. I then melted into the moment of sharing a meal and collectively painting "a masterpiece" my three year old captioned. That's when I walked over to the chart and added Patience and below the boys I wrote Mom. Tracking my own.
My sons deserve a patient mom. I sometimes figured if I asked for patience, God would test it, thus increasing my threshold for pain. So I stopped asking for it. It is my challenge.
Dear Husfriend and I dialogue often. This did not come easily. There have been many growing pains to endure. The conversations are more fluid now. Being surrounded by testosterone all day has given me courage to speak my mind. I am my only advocate. I am my children's advocate. And that of husfriend too. Although you can fill in the blank of my job description. I am personal assistant to 3 men and slave to my abode. Wasn't I supposed to have a robot to do all of this by now? Funny how life takes us forward in time, but things stay the same.
Humanity. Maybe the most important, although, believe me, communication is a close second. Humanity. Not race, color, creed. Humanity. This truth levels the playing field. Who made you more important than me? Than her, than he, than any of us? Each one of us human beings have the same common denominator: Potential. That's what it all boils down to. Fulfill or implode. So for me and my house, we coexist. History teaches us things that reveal the predictable aspects of humanity, but I won't fill the mold. I won't curse myself for someone else's mistakes. I may not even identify with you. While I'm here on this precious planet I will talk to you, console you, educate and learn from you. Peace be with us. Peace be still. Now go talk about it.
Nicole Molino is work at home momma where she runs a successful household while raising two brilliant young men ages 7 and 3. Now that Nicole's sons are both out of diapers (woohoo!), she is finding time for her first love, writing. Nicole lives in sunny south Florida and keeps a busy schedule of play dates and sports. Her creative interests include writing fiction, non-fiction and poetry, singing, arts and crafts, photography and daydreaming. Nicole is co-founder of a grassroots movement of peaceful coexistence and may be reached via MySpace.
by Laura Smith
The artist says, "The client I did this piece for was Southern Nevada Water Authority. The job description was to convey various aspects of Water Conservation through a series of illustrations that would be used in print advertising and as a calendar. This project was to be instructional to children and adults in the Southern Nevada area.
Ron Lopez was the art director on this job and he had a lot of great ideas and yet was very receptive when I would contribute my own ideas to the project. This particular image was based on one of his ideas. In his original rough layout, there was a guy at the opposite end (instead of the dog you see here) helping a woman in the foreground with the pool cover. It was very formal and almost demonstrational, but I was able to convince him that instead of taking a very serious and straightforward approach with this project, that we should keep it light – especially considering the audience. He and I are both fans of Mary Blair’s work, and while I’m not exactly aping her style, I feel it pays homage to her spirit. In the end it all paid off. I was told that children were clipping the art from the paper and doing their versions of the images I painted."
Laura Smith's graphic approach to illustration has been inspired by some of the great poster artists of the first half of the 20th century. Those who have most influenced her have done so because of the simplicity and directness of their work in terms of graphic elements, as well as their ability to communicate an idea quickly and efficiently. She has produced illustrations from advertisements to billboards for such companies as HBO, Microsoft, Capitol Records, Japan Airlines, Heinekin, Time and Newsweek. Her work is featured in the Museum of Modern Art in New York, and most recently three of her posters were added to the collection London’s Victoria & Albert Museum. You can find more of Laura's work at her website, LauraSmithArt.com.
Lit by Chicks
Where I Was, 1995
by Holly Day
when my son was born, I threw away
all the photographs taken of my life from before
I was so determined to become somebody else
that I pretended that I was brand new
just like him
when my husband refused to work, I got a temp job
where I could work a week, then be home a week
so I could spend time with my son
there was no extra money, but I didn’t care
I was so in love with that baby
nothing else mattered
I sold all my records to pay for groceries and rent
I threw away all my clothes that couldn’t be used for work
everything I owned could fit in a backpack
a few pieces of jewelry I could sell in a pinch
enough to take me and my son
somewhere safe
Holly Day’s most recent books are Music Theory for Dummies, Music Composition for Dummies, and Walking Twin Cities. She lives in Minneapolis with her husband and their two children. You can find more of her work at her blog.
